I’m not implying that Gonzales is completely incompetent because I believe it takes a certain level of competence to justify allowing the FBI to tap phones illegally and completely get rid of that whole Habeas Corpus thing. What I am saying is that Alberto Gonzales doesn’t fit the rest of the Bush Cabinet's streak of inhumane treatments.

Yes, he has that utter disregard for civil rights, but where’s the blatant indifference for his fellow man? Where’s that ol’ feeling of danger that former attorney generals used to give us? (“Let the eagle soar…”)

I mean remember Janet Reno? If someone got out of line, Reno wouldn’t just “tap a phone” or fire a bunch of attorneys for political reasons. She’d send in the ATF (even if it was just a kid from Cuba).

And, oh, how I miss those days.

See, things were much simpler during the Reno era. I didn’t belong to any religious cults, nor did I hoard armaments for the eventual war with the American government, so I knew there was no need to invest in gas masks.

But Gonzales is different.

Now when I pick up a phone I half expect to hear the tell-tale clicking noise of Uncle Sam listening in. This isn’t merely liberal paranoia though. It is important for me to note that tradition in my family dictates that we always say “Death to capitalism,” in greeting. I have a feeling that can cause problems…

But wire-tapping doesn’t have the same flare that 100 guys with guns have. And worse, it’s inconsistent with the rest of the Bushies' policy choices of “Let’s blow them up and see what happens.”

It’s for these reasons that I know Mr. Gonzales will not make it through the next three weeks with his title of Attorney General. It won’t be because he keeps getting caught breaking the law or further embarrassing this administration. He’ll lose his job because he can’t keep up with Janet Reno.

If only he shot people…

Patrick Duganz

Dr. Erik Keroack (pro-abstinence Bush appointee who famously asserted that pre-marital sex would lower Oxycontin levels in the brain, and then you'll never be able to love anyone ever) will no longer oversee the program to provide birth control to low-income women. Someone qualified will replace him immediately, and Keroack will no doubt go back to telling minors lies about condoms and sex.

The United Kingdom branch of Amnesty International, once neutral on abortion issues, now supports safe, legal abortions around the world. "In response to current repressive abortion laws, however, AIUK has changed its position in order to continue protecting women's freedom, reproductive and sexual health, and human rights." 
Pro-lifers don't want to hear that crap about rights: "Abortion can never be described as a 'right…' [It] is a needless act of violence that kills babies and hurts women." Evidence shows that lack of clean water, war crimes, unsanitary and unsafe deliveries, and fistuals hurt women more. But who wants to protect those already living?

North Dakota is showing more and more that it's about abortion obsession is not about protecting the unborn or anyone else. Otherwise, anti-abortionists would want teenage girls to have prenatal care for their precious unborn, no matter what. But they don't. Underage girls need their parents' consent for that, too — or they go without, putting their own health and the health of their unborn babies in jeopardy. This is not about the unborn — this is about state control over your body and what you choose to do with it.

The same goes for Missouri. Governor Matt Blunt has cut all funding to Planned Parenthood centers — including the majority which do not even provide abortions but provide cancer screenings for women who otherwise would not have access. So, even if you're not seeking birth control, are not pregnant, or don't want an abortion, you will not be screened for a deadly disease as early as possible. Pro-life indeed.

"Researchers in Sweden…have found that equality could be associated with poorer health for both men and women." But the Harvard School of Public Health says: "We conclude that women experience higher mortality and morbidity in states where they have lower levels of political and economic autonomy. Living in such states has detrimental consequences for the health of men as well."

Another Harvard study: "…women who resided in states with high reproductive rights scored…lower [for depression]…compared with women who lived in states with lower reproductive rights. Gender inequality appears to contribute to depressive symptoms in women."

Well, I don't know about the rest of you ladies, but these results trump all others for me: "More Orgasms for Single Women."

For more studies on gender equality and happiness levels, see the Google search results.

Jennifer Leblanc

Many Americans assume that women in the U.S. military are stationed far from the fighting. While it's true they can't train for frontline combat positions, the changing nature of the Iraq war has placed many women at the center of the conflict. Yet the women serving and dying for the U.S. have received very little attention.

Who are they, why did they join, and what are their experiences and points of view?

On this edition, Sarah Olson speaks with veterans of the U.S. Army, Navy, and Marines, and to one active duty soldier who served for a year as an Army journalist in Iraq. Each woman has a unique story, but all share an understanding of the power politics of the U.S. military and the price that is paid by women seeking to serve their country.

Featuring::

Anuradha Bhagwati, former Marine captain; Maricela Guzman, former information technician in the U.S. Navy; Linsay Rousseau Burnett, Sergeant U.S. Army, first brigade combat team, 101st Airborne division; Stefani Pelkey, former Army captain. Senior Producer/Host: Tena Rubio. Mixing Engineer: Phillip Babich. Intern: Alexis McCrimmon.

For more information::

Vets for Vets: 520-250-0509; info@vets4vets.us; www.vets4vets.us

Iraq and Afghan Veterans for America: 770 Broadway, 2nd Floor, New York, NY 10003; 212-982-9699; info@iava.org; www.iava.org

Iraq Veterans Against the War: P.O. Box 8296, Philadelphia, PA 19101; 215.241.7123; ivaw@ivaw.org; www.ivaw.org

Women of Color Resource Center: 1611 Telegraph Ave. #303, Oakland, CA 94612; 510-444-2700; info@coloredgirls.org; www.coloredgirls.org

Women Veterans of America National Headquarters: P.O. Box 72 Bushkill, PA 18324; 570-588-4674; www.womenveteransofamerica.com

Harlan Douglas Weikle

I have noticed recently the decline of the thong. It emerged in my high school about three years ago. I cannot forget the first one I saw. A red, lacy number, not just peeking, more like gaping, out of the back of one of my star student’s jeans. I will call this girl Maxine to protect her “innocence.” Maxine studied fastidiously and consistently received As on her chemistry tests and quizzes. I could always count on her to be the top grade earner in my classes. Then, one day, I saw the thong. I was shocked. Maxine was so modest in every other way. She was shy, and she never bragged about her intelligence, success, and popularity. Unlike other girls, she never exposed her décolletage to the extent that to look at her chest was like looking down the grand canyon. I thought she would be so embarrassed if I told her, but I had to — it was part of the job. I found a moment when the rest of the class was engrossed in their assigned problems. I whispered next to her ear, “Maxine, your underwear is showing!” She looked at me, shrugged, and said, “Oh. Oh, well.” She turned around and went back to work, making no move to cover herself. I gave up the whispering, clearly more embarrassed than she, and said, “Pull up your pants, Maxine.” She did but still didn’t seem to care if anyone caught her in the act of adjusting her undergarments.

After the Maxine incident, I started to notice them everywhere. I couldn’t turn around without being faced with cotton, satin, patterned, plain, even one with a smiley face looking up at me as if to say, “That’s right, I’m on display.”

Many teenage girls today lack the modesty of girls of the near past. I have to blame the media on this one. I am generally loathe to pin it all on TV, movies, and celebrities, but really it has become quite acceptable to expose what would make many women blush.

Fortunately, the preppy fashion trend is finally trickling down to us here in the Midwest. I am seeing higher-wasted pants and more demure polo shirts. I love it. In fact, I haven’t seen a thong in at least a week. A new, disturbing trend, however, has appeared now in the other sex. It’s become so prevalent that our principal actually made an announcement stating an amendment to the dress code: boys may not wear girls pants! Yes teenage boys are now wearing girl’s skinny jeans. They don’t fit properly around the hips, so they end up halfway down their butts. Now the boys are exposing their underwear. At least they wear boxers.

Mary Ellen Freund

Kathleen Mary Rowe-Glendon

I’ll admit to being very jaundiced about that particular subject. A prison term will do that. As an inmate, I was an eyewitness to so many concrete examples of violent behavior that cynicism has become my constant companion. There were mass beatings, torture, stabbings, and rapes, just to name a few things. There is certain stillness in a room before a fight breaks out. It’s almost as if the oxygen is sucked out of the room and time virtually stands still. In the dining hall one evening, an inmate threw homemade acid on someone who had made critical comments about her girlfriend. Unfortunately, that woman will be disfigured for life and forever damaged for some idle gossip.

There were the zombie inmates; at least that’s what I called them. I made the mistake of looking one of them in the eye. “Now I know what they mean by "soul-less." I shuddered as if someone walked across my grave. Literally, there was nothing human about those zombie inmates; the humanity was seared out of them long ago. If one met such a person on the street, most of us would cross to the other side, feeling a vague nameless foreboding; our fight-or-flight instinct would kick in immediately.

I am no longer surprised when I see violent women depicted in the media. Meeting these women in person is sobering. They kill, maim, and abuse their children, but they are always innocent, blaming a spouse, drugs, or an abusive background. One woman I met shot her husband 25 times in the face with a shotgun, tried to get acquitted, and repeatedly appealed her conviction because of unproven allegations of spousal abuse, which I feel is the modern-day equivalent of the “Twinkie” defense. The court rightfully decided that the re-loading of the shotgun indicated some sort of intent and, as far as I know, she‘s still there still exhibiting no remorse.

There are many such stories. One of my old roommates attempted to kill her husband by putting Drain-O in his soda can. Obviously, she wasn’t the sharpest pencil in the box because the Drain-O melted the tin can. She tried to blame her actions on being abused also. It turns out that she was angry because the poor man cut off her access to his accounts because she was spending all of their money on methamphetamine. Again, no remorse for almost killing the poor man, not to mention the psychological damage she caused their children.

It is unfortunate that the domestic violence defense is so abused because there are many women who suffer daily from this epidemic, living almost a concentration camp existence. The prison term opened my eyes as there are many who would take something that has validity and twist it to suit their own advantage.

The soldier mentioned in my first paragraph also had “zombie” eyes as she turned her grinning face to the camera leaning over some tortured soul’s corpse and, even after being punished, still exhibits no remorse.

Video games, television, rap music, advertising has all contributed to our becoming the deadlier of the species. There is a new Quentin Tarantino movie being advertised that shows a comely woman in a short skirt with a machine gun for a leg. Typical movie — random violence, carnage, and death ensue; violence for violence's sake. I know I don’t want my children to see that garbage.

I spent almost two years of my life in a dog-eat-dog environment. I am saddened at my own battle with desensitization and am in constant mourning for my lost innocence. I hope one day to lose “my prison face” and regain my Pollyanna attitude.

Kathleen Mary Rowe-Glendon

I've never liked Katie Couric. She was mildly irritating on the Today Show. She's absolutely out of her element on CBS Nightly News. Back when the talk of a woman anchor was going around, I was rooting for Christiane Amanpour — a real journalist. Amanpour would have never opened her first newscast by announcing pictures of the new Cruise/Holmes baby — which is when I turned off Katie Couric and never went back. If Couric wanted to prove her nightly news cred, she should've had the sense to veto any and all entertainment drivel. Entertainment Tonight is after your show, sweetie.

Now, on top of poor ratings, Couric has to deal with angry viewers. Apparently her interview with John and Elizabeth Edwards did not go over well. Couric doesn't approve of their decision to still try for the White House with Elizabeth's cancer recurrence. But it's really not her business to judge how someone chooses to battle a disease, no matter how many times Katie may flaunt her colon on TV for a cause. ♦

Over at the New York Times, there's a definitive headline: "Poor Behavior is Linked to Time in Daycare." You know what that means, ladies — you get your uterus out of that workplace and back in the kitchen. It's all your career-minded fault that we have little devils running amok.

I don't have children. I have a spark of a career going. And I have mighty opinions. So how about if we take a look at how kids are dealt with rather than where. Has anyone else lately heard a parent say to a child, "we'll make a compromise"? Have you seen the child with half the control then finish out the raging fit anyway? I'm going to sound old, but back when I was a kid, there was no compromise. You did what the adult said, because you were two feet high and your brain was far less developed, which meant you had no say. I'm a spare-the-rod type — I was never hit. But I was also raised by an adult who did not compromise with a tot. ♦

Now let's look at people who are actually changing the democratic process…by making lame videos.

On Monday night, the Justice Department delivered to Congress more than 3,000 pages of emails, memos, and other records about the firing of eight U.S. attorneys. The handover came so late that many news organizations had to scramble to try to skim a few headlines from the files before late-night deadlines. According to The New York Sun:

"Despite the late hour, readers of a liberal website, tpmmuckraker.com, tackled the task with gusto. They quickly began grabbing 50-page chunks of the scanned documents from a House of Representatives Internet server, analyzing them, and excerpting them. The first post about the Department of Justice records hit the left-leaning news and commentary site at 1:04 a.m. Within half an hour, there were 50 summaries posted by readers gleaning the documents. By 4:30 a.m., more than 220 postings were up detailing various aspects of the files."

And that's how you get your hands dirty. ♦

Jennifer Leblanc