Jessica Cutler has filed for bankruptcy. This is what happens when your awful, never-should-have-been-published book doesn't sell, you have no other purpose or skill in life other than having sex for money, and the legal fees pile up when a former john sues you for kissing and telling. This made me smile.

Then God, in her infinite wisdom, smiled on my world some more, and put Paris Hilton in jail. This is what happens, ladies, when, again, you serve no purpose on this earth and defy the law. This made me do a happy dance.

My goodness, there's more! Joe Francis is still in jail. And even if he gets out, there's another charge, in another state, waiting for him. In fact, those other charges are why he is hiding in his current cell. He's just not man enough to take it like the intoxicated, unconscious, underage girls in his videos. These may only be tax charges, but if it was enough to keep Capone in jail, it's enough for Francis. This gave me hope.

Alas, God must have gotten distracted by that pesky genocide in the Sudan or something. Dina Lohan has been given her own reality TV show in which she ruins the lives of her other two children in her own selfish search for fame. I guess living vicariously through Li-Lo isn't much fun during her second tour of rehab. So I asked God, why? Why do my fellow humans perpetually harrass anonymous, hard-working, loving mothers everywhere for simply getting a day job, while Di-Lo is rewarded for mothering skills that would make Medea say, "Have you no shame, woman?"  

For this, I thanked God for giving me a mother who saved my life instead of ruined it and for teaching me to respect, not exploit, myself and others.

Jennifer Leblanc