Stand up, Mr. Funny Man

Stand-up comedy is like suicide when you are new to the art form. Every time the MC calls your name for you to come on stage, your knuckles go white and you feel an invisible trigger coldly press against your index finger.

"HI! I almost didn't make it to the stage tonight. I got into the room and saw this guy I used to date. My heart just stopped…but then it started again. So all's good!"

Silence.

"So the other day I went to the supermarket and asked the teller for…."

People start fidgeting.

"You know, before I came here tonight, I practiced my set ten times on my cat…He didn't laugh once."

Silence. BAM!

It's a cold, lonely death; and as you walk off that stage, there's no crowd to comfort you or pay their respects. They have moved onto the next comedian, glad that you are done for the night. All you have is you to beat yourself for not being funny.

I've been doing stand-up comedy over a year now. I've performed seven times, flopped three. The last time I performed, I was so nervous that a lady offered me these pills that slow down your heart.

Reason why I still go back there?

It's an adrenaline rush.