Yesterday, at Camden, I tried on lace-up steel-toed
space boots but they looked better on the salesgirl
with three tongue studs. After nearly getting stampeded
by schoolgirls who thought they saw Robbie Williams,
I-- and I trundled into the new Globe with fellow groundlings
in ponchos to see The Tempest in the rain (appropriate, really).
I made a friend raving at the Drome: a Carmen Miranda lookalike
who gilded her fruit with UV paint and swung her hips faster
than the flashing blue lasers. I've chosen not to harass the pigeons
at Trafalgar Square, though I did help some tourists from Kyoto
take pictures and I did ride atop a red doubledecker bus. We’ve gone
three nights in a row on Sainsbury's microwaveable chicken
tikka masala. I watch too much Channel 4, but
there's no hope of stopping.